Have you ever had one of those moments where you sit and ask, “Why am I doing this?” If you have been in ministry for a while, you probably want me to clarify if I mean just this week. The fact of the matter is that ministry in any form brings trials, frustrations, and doubts. If you are a volunteer, you probably wonder at times what good you are doing with such fixed time constraints. If you are full time, you wonder if anything is getting through to the students you stand before week after week. I know for myself, I am always my toughest critic. Why aren’t my messages bringing about life change? Why aren’t the programs being filled with new students? Why are we still getting complaints about what the students wear and their behavior?

If any of you are like me, and I have a strange suspicion there may be a few, when I first heard and answered the call to youth ministry, I knew for sure that every student I would come in contact with would give their life to Jesus. It didn’t happen that way. In fact, I think I drove many students away in those early years. It is now over 20 years later and I am still at it. I am still passionate about student ministry. I may even be more passionate now than I was, but I still struggle with feelings of inadequacy and questions of if I am doing ministry well.

Let’s be honest for a second. We are all in some way competitive. We live in a society where success is measured by numbers and size. Who has the biggest program with the most students and best facilities?  Find that person, and go do what they are doing. I have to confess, it sure makes me feel good when some other youth pastor or leader wants to come by and see what we are doing because he or she has heard we are doing great things. I find myself comparing our programs with others to see how we stack up. There is nothing wrong with wanting to do your very best or having a huge vision. The question is what is the motivation? Why do you do what you do?

I recently gave a message on Mary and Martha to our high school students from Luke 10. We have all probably given this message, but my point was about choosing the great thing over the good thing. It struck me as I was speaking to a small group of students that we were doing good ministry, but we weren’t great. Sure, we had all the programs, camps, and facilities that would make some envious, but it was missing something and I found it in Mary and Martha.

What Martha was doing was good, but what Mary did was great. You see when ministry is focused on what I can do or on who I can impress it will never be more than just good. When the focus is taken off me and put on Jesus, it has the opportunity to be great. I think it is interesting that Mary was at Jesus’ feet, not sitting beside him. When you walked in you probably didn’t even notice Mary, unless you tripped over her. Martha was easily noticed because of all she was doing. There are many of us who do not take the time to do this kind of work and do it with excellence, but when the focus becomes the work and not the one we are working for trouble and frustration will come.

Unfortunately, many of us settle for good. We are concerned if we look busy enough or with attendance numbers or baptisms or, you know the list. It is important to track growth and numbers are important, but is this our motivation? Do we do it for the numbers and prestige, or do we do it because we are driven by an unspeakable force to love and reach out to students. I have come to the realization that I am driven, but I am incapable of having any lasting or real impact without Christ.

When I empty myself of the expectations of recognition and allow Jesus to simply speak through me, something stirs. When I forget about what I look like or who I am trying to impress and simply become obedient to the call on my life, then the amazing happens; the Spirit moves, hearts are stirred and lives are changed. When I understand it is not about me, but it is all about a God who so desperately wants to bring his children back into his arms and has invited me to watch and be awed, it is then ministry of lasting impact happens.

I do student ministry because it is what I was made to do, but I am so aware that I am incapable of any of it without the grace and guidance of Christ. I am accountable to my church, students and parents, but I work for God. I gladly place myself under the authority of my Pastor and wisely take his council, but it is the Spirit that leads me and brings any success. My messages and planning are fruitless unless God is in them and has ordained them. I was once challenged to dream so big, that if God was not in it, it would fail. I have found that I can not out dream God. My dreams and vision, when relying solely on my abilities, are pitifully small, but God’s dreams are unimaginable.

John the Baptist said it right in John 3:30 when he said, “He must become greater; I must become less.” Jesus is the only great one. For me to endure in ministry and to see real impact and change, I must be less.  It is not about me. I am just a joyful invitee into a world where anything is possible when we choose the great thing instead of settling for the good.

Tony.